With Father’s Day right around the corner on June 19, we decided to have a few laughs poking a little fun at dear ole’ dad. Because we love our fathers so much and since dad’s tend to be the comedian in the family we decided to put together this blog in their honor. Here are a few highlights to some Father’s Day spoofs we hope you enjoy.
Story #1: A mom is in the delivery room while her baby is crowning and her husband looks like Johnny bench waiting for his pride and joy to enter into the world he pops his head up from behind the sheet where her legs are raised and says “honey why is his hair bright red when were both brunettes?”
Story #2: When our daughter Sarah first learned to drive she asked her father to take her out. Willingly he agreed as he hopped in the back seat behind Sarah. With a disheveled look on her face she asked “dad what you doing?” In which my husband quickly replied “I’ve been waiting for this moment your whole life.” With a puzzled look on her face she glared into the rear view mirror as my husband anxiously connected his seatbelt. He looked up and said “I’ve been waiting to kick the back of your seat and now it’s my turn”.
Story #3: Last year for my son’s baseball team party I asked my husband to go to Walgreens and pick up some candy to fill gift bags. When my husband returned he opens the bags of candy and distributed them to help me out. Hours later I had several calls from the other parents asking if anyone had reported the flu. Although I was puzzled I continued cleaning reflecting on who may have bought a sick child to the party. While I was taking out the garbage I glanced inside the bag and found that my husband accidentally purchased sugar-free red vines and Hershey bars. Although he meant well thinking sugar-free was a better way to go what he didn’t see was the warning on the package explaining the ingredients to cause a laxative effect.
Story#4: My husband is a huge fan of politics. After returning home from the store I found my four-year-old contently watching television with his father. As I began to rant and rave about my visit to the supermarket my son quickly corrected me with this reply “Shhhh, be quiet… daddy is watching the rerection”.
Well kids say the darndest things, we all know who the culprit really is. But we wouldn’t change it for the world. We hope you enjoyed our stories that we shared with you. Feel free to drop us a line and tell us about your dad spoofs.
For reservations and party information, contact our staff.
We love to entertain kids and family here at The Wow Factory.
Our indoor play center in South Florida is the perfect place to have a birthday party or to just have an awesome day of fun.
We are going to entertain you with some funny quotes that Dad’s say during parties.
The stage was set for Beth to have her 15th birthday party and everyone was excited. Everyone, including Beth’s father who was also very nervous. He wanted his daughter’s birthday to be special as everyone else did. He helped decorate the room, went on a very important gift hunt for his little girl and did as much as he could to ensure that her birthday would be a time to remember. After weeks of planning the celebration, the table and decorations were flowing gently in the breeze, the cake is perfectly frosted and the guests arrive with smiles and the finishing touches to an incredible day. Everyone is sitting around, while Beth is opening her gifts and the room is quiet, Beth’s dad blurts out “Holy Crispy Critters your parents spent a fortune on that!” and Beth sinks into a cloud of pure embarrassment.
Sometimes dads say the most random things. At the Wow Factory we’ve heard just about everything. Here’s some common and not-so-common quotes we’ve heard coming from the lips of our hairiest members of the family…Dad.
“Lefty loosey, righty tighty”
“Don’t tell your mother”
“The Cleveland Browns will win the Superbowl this year.”
“Did she really get that big?”
“Wow son, who gave you that gift? It’s going to take 4 hours to put it together.”
“I was with the twelve disciples. After my wife sees this bill this will be my last supper!”
“Billy, here’s the keys, you drive. You’re old enough, right?”
“Money is that thing you’ll never see. But hear us parents always talk about.”
“How long is that return line usually?”
“Go wash your upper lip.”
“You have no idea how long it took me to order that online”
“I shop at the biggest store in the world. Amazon.”
“What’s the return on that puppy?”
“Leggos again son, my left foot is still recovering from the last time I stepped on them.”
Your mother is right, even when she is wrong.”
“We were grateful to get an orange for Christmas”
“Can we return the Leggos, for something else?”
“Don’t tell your grandmother”
“Were You Raised in a Barn?”
“Tell your sister to stop dancing like Beyoncé. “
“I know it’s your birthday, but your mother asked me what kind of cake I wanted.”
While you can’t always blame the fathers knowing how to refrain from saying certain things or anything or that matter. But that’s part of what makes them who they are. We love dad no matter how goofy, corny or random the words are that may come out of their mouth.
Nonetheless, we hope you enjoyed a little poke at the pops, but we love our Dads and would like to hear from you!
What are your funny dad quotes? We’d love for you to share with the readers.